“The objectively stupidest president in our nation’s often boneheaded history, the undisputed clown-car king of This Time, attempted, via one of the oldest racist tropes in the old-white-man canon, to malign one of the smartest men ever to hold our highest office, along with one of the classiest, most accomplished and beloved of First Ladies.”
What’s worse than a Trump presidency? A second Trump presidency, clearly. But can there be anything worse than that? A tough question, really. Maybe a gang of racoons – a nursery of the ostensibly adorable rank-refuse bandits, if any of us is still being all woke up in here – drunk as a stench of …
This is not my fault. We need to be clear on that right here at the outset. I would gladly never have seen what I am about to relate to you, and which you may soon also wish I had not shared as well. What was it Barney the purple dinosaur was so fond of …
I started this post, a pre-appraisal of this year of our wisely absent Lord, 2025, on the night of Dec. 31 of the previous one. It’s something I’ve undertaken in some fashion most New Year’s, for more than a decade now. But this time, I just stopped, right in the middle of it. I couldn’t …
Early last evening, still a ways prior to the pop-off chaos of July 4 celebration, I was down at the end of our driveway messing with some damn yard blemish or other, just up from the stationary parade of tiny United States flags my one neighbor puts out along his curb every time a day …
In the game of golf, as in life, there are penalties. Without some repercussions built into the system, your bulbous neighbors Gareth and Becky Anne are soon enough dancing buck-wild nekkid in your shared driveway under the new strawberry moon, while your “president” is illegally deporting your fellow citizens to foreign countries where they yank …
This will surely piss off some of you. Fine. The time to be pissed off is now. You fucks. You lousy, defeatist fucks. Now that I’ve set the tone: This is an open letter to the Democratic Party, from one of your own. To be more exact, likely soon to be one of your former …
Things that come in fours. The seasons. The number of legs on a chair, or wheels on a car. The cardinal directions, north, south, east, west. The suits in a standard deck of cards. The classical elements, earth, air, fire, water. The principal phases of the moon. Of course, there were also those four dudes …
I can never keep it straight, is the third time the charm, or does trouble come in threes? Anyway, this feature is back, and every bit as charming as the two times before. So you needn’t let the thought of it improving trouble you in any way. Some things, you see, just aren’t worth trying …
Avoidance! Diversions! Escapism! As a service to our occasional customers, we’ve brought back this possibly unpopular feature. If we cared more about you, you’d have real content once in a while, sure. So go pay somebody already – even lousy CNN now has a paywall for some of its content. But not us, not here, …